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I’m coming back…I promise

30 May 2012 by Aya

Hi all, 

This is not going to be a very interesting post, just an explanatory one. I know that I haven’t written anything in a very long time, and I apologize. However, circumstances have been such that I have not had any motivation to write. Though I will not go into the details, about a month ago, the person closest and most important to me passed away due to an ongoing illness. Partly as a result, I have found myself to be very unproductive and unhealthy ever since. 

I am determined to change that, however, and though I’ve already started down the road to betterment, it will take a little while before I can reach my ultimate goal. Until then, bear with me. 

My blog will be undergoing some changes, as well. “Back from the Past” will probably disappear as a separate section, while a new one for health will be added. I’m debating whether or not I should change the appearance of the blog itself, and would gladly take your input on the matter. The main aspect of the blog will still be my random little (and not-so-little) articles, though I know I have not written anything of any actual worth in well over a year. Hopefully that will change. Perhaps I will be able to find a better theme for them (though no promises). 

In the meantime, thanks for your patience.

Best, 
Aya 

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Pick Up Your F*cking Feet!

1 March 2012 by Aya

I have a question: how difficult is it to lift your feet when walking? Why is it that certain people find it acceptable to drag their feet along the ground with every step they take? Were they not taught that that’s probably not a good idea? (In case you weren’t, see reasons below.)

This has always bugged me, but only recently have I found myself growing truly aggravated whenever the sound of dragging feet reaches my ears. The reason I bring it up today, though, is because of an incident that damn near drove me insane this morning:

I was walking to one of my classes from the subway station. The moment I exited the latter, I heard that sound behind me. Out of all other sounds, it stood out the most, and ground on my nerves. I tried to ignore it, but it became harder and harder for each passing minute. I turned around a few times and gave the offending girl a slightly dirty look, conspicuously looking at her feet — an obvious hint that she should PICK THEM THE FUCK UP. But she either didn’t get it, or just wanted to spite me; she kept dragging them — loudly, and with every single step she took — and, as luck would have it, she seemed to be tailing me. I wished that she would disappear into one of the buildings along the way, but no — it turned out that she was heading to the very same building as I.

Several times I had to hold myself back from whirling around, stepping right up to her, and screaming into her face: “Stop being a lazy ass and pick up your fucking feet when you walk!” But, being the cultured person that I am, I did no such thing.

And I regret it still.

Seriously, though, if you’re someone who drags their feet when they walk, you have got to stop. I’ve compiled a short list of reasons as to why that might be a good idea:

  • It’s unattractive – makes you seem lazy and sloppy.
  • The sound is annoying as fuck. You will thoroughly aggravate the vast majority of those people in your vicinity who have to endure your foot-dragging.
  • It’s bad for your shoes. Can you imagine how much quicker your soles will wear out just because you don’t have the decency to lift your feet?
  • You burn fewer calories than if you were to walk properly.
  • More than anything, though — IT’S ANNOYING AS FUCK!

Just saying.

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Failure #2

27 February 2012 by Aya

The Paleo diet does not seem to be for me, because I have failed yet AGAIN. In fact, so awful was my failure this time, that the last one starkly pales in comparison.

After the birthday celebration for my dad, I was unable to hold back from the leftovers. Then I flew out to Edmonton for a few days, and what I ended up consuming there will probably give me nightmares for several weeks. Today I promised myself to be healthy again, but it just isn’t happening. I’ve got other, more important thoughts on my mind.

I’m not setting another date for a third attempt yet. In fact, I think that what I’ll do is stop boring you with the details, keep trying to do the diet, and when I manage to make it last for thirty days, I will let you know the details of my venture.

As for now – bread, butter and cheese await in the kitchen below.

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Exception Day – a.k.a. I get to actually eat!

21 February 2012 by Aya

Today is Day 8 of my challenge, and though it has been difficult, it has thus far been successful. I won’t lie – there have been several instances where I have wanted to simply give it up. And if I were to continue on with my little experiment through tomorrow, that’s precisely what I would have done. Instead, I have thought of another solution:

Tomorrow, 22 February, will be an exception day in my 30-day challenge. It will not be an exception day in that I will be able to eat whatever the hell I want; no, rather it will be an exception day where I will take part in my father’s birthday celebration, which will require eating some homemade foods that will contain dairy and/or processed foods, as well as cake.

Of course, I could try to restrain myself and continue my challenge in spite of these celebrations, but I know myself too well to think that I would last. If I were to try to restrain myself, the regret of not having eaten such delicious food during a familial celebration – an infrequent occurrence as it is – would gnaw at me incessantly, until I completely caved in and binged on unhealthiness – thereby completely negating whatever progress I have made – well before the deadline date. Instead, I think it would be better to put on pause my challenge for one day to appease my family (and myself), and then to recommence the moment the celebrations have come to an end.

Now, a few rules (of course) regarding this exception day:

  1. The exception applies only to the duration of the celebratory birthday dinner; it does not apply to the rest of the day, throughout which I will have to maintain my healthy vigil.
  2. The exception does not apply to leftovers. I can eat the food that is in front of me while sitting at the table during the celebratory dinner; however, the moment the celebrations have ceased, the exception expires. Even if there is leftover deliciousness (and especially if there is leftover cake) in the fridge, I am not to touch it, irrespective of how much I want to.
  3. The exception is not an invitation to pig out on unhealthy deliciousness. I have to restrain myself from completely pigging out. I will eat a little bit of everything (no more – though of course no less – than anyone else at the table), and then will force myself to be satisfied.
  4. As a result of the exception day, the overall challenge end date will have to be pushed back one day, and will now be 16 March, 2012.

And now that this prospect awaits me, I most excitedly await tomorrow evening.

But Iam interested to know the following: do you guys think this is fair? Or will my doing this completely undermine the challenge, thereby resulting in a failure? Do you think that, if I want to take part in tomorrow’s celebrations, I should begin the challenge anew?

Let me know!

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Bye-bye Dairy

18 February 2012 by Aya

So, it is day five of my challenge, and so far, I have not caved in to my temptations. Instead, when I have felt hungry (which is damn near all the time), I have turned to the foods on my permitted list.

Particularly my beloved cottage cheese and yogurt.

I have neither seen nor felt any difference in how I have been feeling lately (compared to pre-diet), however, and I’m starting to get concerned that, in giving myself leeway in following the paleolithic guidelines, I’m undermining the entire experiment. This concern has caused me to make the following decision:

Scratch all exceptions from my Rules; I’m going to be following this Paleolithic Diet the way it was intended to be followed. In case you don’t want to go back to my first post to peruse the rules and figure out what I’m completely cutting out (though I can’t imagine why you wouldn’t want to do something so exciting), I will reiterate here what I had decided to permit myself, and what I will now no longer be able to consume:

  • Legumes: green and yellow beans; peas.
  • Dairy: cottage cheese; yogurt.
  • Grains: oatmeal.

My initial reason for letting myself eat these foods was mainly my lack of competence in the kitchen, and virtual inability to feed myself. I felt I was limiting myself enough as it was, and needed at least SOME variety to help me get through the day. Now I’ll have to go without, and figure out how to subsist on the true cave(wo)man diet.

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Pies: the Bane of My Existence

17 February 2012 by Aya

Well, it is the fourth day of my paleolithic challenge, and so far I have managed to hold up fairly well: I haven’t slipped and eaten something I’m not supposed to.

But the ultimate test starts now.

My grandmother, a fantastic baker, has started making her renown – and delicious – mini-pies (see pictures), filled with a mashed potato/mushroom stuffing. They constitute some of the most delicious food I have ever had the pleasure to eat. Their aroma is intoxicating, their consistency delightful, their flavours – mind-blowing.

And they’re driving me crazy.

If anything will break what little resolve I have, this is it. I have fled to my second-floor office to evade the smell, but it has started seeping in under my door even up here. I have some yogurt and blackberries in front of me to distract me from what’s going on downstairs.

My head is reeling.

What makes all of this worse is the perpetual feeling of hunger that has settled uncomfortably somewhere in the pit of my stomach. I’m not sure if it’s what I’m eating, or if it’s what I’m NOT eating, but something has me constantly thinking about food, about all the deliciousness that I am missing, all the yummy pastries with which I could be stuffing myself…the yummy pastries currently being baked downstairs in my own kitchen…

Never before have I wanted to move out into my own place more than at this moment.

I MUST resist.

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I’m Hungry (days 1 and 2)

15 February 2012 by Aya

Well, so far, so good. I haven’t really completed a full forty-eight hours yet, but I’m less than two hours away, and I’m pretty much done eating for the day. I’ve been trying not to think about the yumminess that I’m missing out on, and of course several times I was tempted to just drop this absurd experiment and go back to eating like a normal, uninhibited human being.

But, thankfully, I resisted.

Hardest of all has been figuring out what to eat. My family’s diet has always contained a LOT of starch- and flour-based food (possibly a consequence of where we’re from) and it is very difficult to turn away from that. Worst of all, I’m not very good in the kitchen to begin with, so so far I’ve been subsisting on salads, berries, yogurt, cottage cheese, oatmeal (see? Imagine if I cut those last three out), and whatever my grandmother or aunt make that the paleo diet allows (which is usually next to nothing).

As a result, I am frequently hungry, and find myself eating things in somewhat ridiculous fashion. For example, when I got home this evening, the first thing I did was check the stove and see if anything appetizing (and permissible) was present. I grabbed a chicken drumstick, ignored the delicious-looking basmati, sighed at the sight of potatoes, and steered myself toward an unopened package of smoked fish (I don’t even know what kind of fish it was). I ate the drumstick standing up, grabbed a plate, cut off a chunk of the fish, and devoured that, too. With nothing on the side (a definite first for me). Afterward I made myself a fruit salad (strawberry-blueberry-banana) in plain, old-fashioned yogurt. And now I’m drinking a cup of tea.

All in the space of about an hour or so.

I’m out of things I could potentially eat, too, which just makes everything so much worse, since I don’t have time tomorrow morning before class to go grocery shopping. Breakfast I can manage, and I think I can scrap together a lunch, but dinner is up in the air.

More than anything: I miss bread.

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